A friend (female, of course) said to me the other day, “think about it from my perspective”. As I considered her words I started to think about everything I do from a woman’s perspective.
Let me play out a common scenario:
I meet a girl, usually through mutual friends, we hit it off, we get to know each other, we chat, we text, we setup a date. I take her out, we have fun, she comes back to my place, we are intimate, she stays the night, we spend the next day together, she might stay the next night or she might head home (depends on the situation). We continue to text and chat throughout the week, she meets me again that next week, we repeat.
Now we have had two weekends of fun and good times… and I’m bored. I have gotten out of her everything I can. I am not speaking sexually, I am speaking mentally. I am exhausted and bored and disinterested. So I make the call and explain to her that it was great getting to know her but I see that we are on two different paths and to be fair to both of us it is best we move on from each other. In my opinion, my actions are open, honest, fair, kind, and reasonable.
Here comes the “woman’s perspective”:
If I were a woman and I received this call I would like to think I wouldn’t be upset, but I would be. I would be crushed. I would run through a million questions in my mind:
Was it my body?
Was it my personality?
Did I talk too much?
Did I talk too little?
And so on….
I would think about this night and day, every minute of every day, every second of every minute, over analyzing and wondering what I did wrong. I would ask my friends. I would read articles and books. I would do everything I could to get that one simple answer which will make it ok in my head.
Well ladies, there isn’t one simple answer. Sometimes, and I know this is difficult to believe, sometimes it just isn’t right. Sometimes two people just aren’t compatible. And, sometimes, this isn’t uncovered until the relationship becomes physical.