If you are dating a player and hope he will commit then ask yourself these questions:
1. How many times have you told your friends you are in love with him and that he loves you as if saying it out loud makes it more true?
2. Have you had to explain to your friends why he can’t commit to you?
3. Have you tried to convince yourself (and your friends) that the good times were so amazingly good that it was worth the sadness?
4. Do your friends point out that no matter what, he is incapable of being what you need?
5. Have you ever asked yourself “can a player ever truly be married“?
6. Do you try to look for a way to be happy if he never changes?
7. Are you in pain almost nearly all the time because his words don’t match his actions?
8. Do you hope he will change and often wonder “can a woman change a player“?
9. Do you force yourself to believe that the relationship is perfect?
10. Have you thought to yourself that if only you loved him more or spent more money on him or did not have any “expectations” for the relationship that it would be okay?
I think we can all agree it hasn’t worked out too well for you.
My advice: Move forward without the player
The relationship with him only hurts you. You cannot be the best version of you as long as you are with him. You must let this go. You need a strong and loving voice in your head to tell you how beautiful you are and how much love is available to you. You do NOT need the player’s voice in your head telling you that you will never measure up.
And, even if he doesn’t use the words his actions or his random comments referencing other women are felt by you. These are real.
I love you too much to tell you anything but the truth. The truth here is that this guy is bad news for you. I don’t think he’s a bad guy and I’m not going to judge him. But, the two of you together is a bad idea, regardless of his
inherent goodness. Sometimes the people we love are unhealthy for us. I very strongly believe this is the case for you with the player.
Find a way to break it off with him. Find a way to stop texting him. You can climb out of love with him. Find a good guy – one who deserves you and will treat you with trust, honesty and respect.
Love ya!
Aimee Lane
